I moved away, and before that, I lengthily said goodbyes and packed. It wasn't an unpleasant process, looking at the past and celebrating what I've accomplished. It was, however, time consuming. When I wanted to read, I would feel nervous. Even now, my body is so wired for feeling proactive and getting things accomplished that I have difficulty spending more than a few minutes on what I used to do.
|Thank you Tumblr!|
I haven't listened to music in weeks. I haven't read in weeks. I haven't been keeping up to date with the world. I haven't been blogging.
I don't know what I have been doing to replace all of this except worrying. I know I could spend more time on my interests if I wanted to. Maybe it means I'll say "No" to an event for once. That's okay.
I saw the tail end of a presentation run by my school about managing success, and I saw very little, except one part about how horrible perfectionism can be. It narrows life by forcing a path of guaranteed success that doesn't exist. People can get so wrapped up in what they should do, that they aren't able to enjoy what they are doing.
I don't know if that applies to me, but I do think that's something I'm prone to. I have socialized and been more extroverted in the past week than I've ever been before, and it exhausts me. Constantly introducing myself, learning about new people, figuring out what's okay or not, it doesn't come naturally to me. I have to put in the effort. I am an introverted person because I draw strength from myself and the time I spend reflecting, alone.
|I am a pretty huge fan of jeggings and skinny jeans though.|
However, I can't pretend that being with other people is some horrible form of torture. I want to do more on the blog, but I can't say that no one lets me do this. In fact, the people I've met have been very kind. They're all fascinating people, and learning about their stories has opened my eyes to the stories that exist in real life. Their lives are different from mine in many ways but we've all reached the same place.
And what I'm trying to remember is that it's okay to take time off from the blog and try something different. I'm not leaving The Sirenic Codex. Far from that, but right now, life is happening, and I want to experience it. When things slow down, I'll hopefully be inspired to write a lot, and everything will have worked out perfectly.